Major Key: Making Yourself A Priority

// "It's not selfish to love yourself, take care of yourself, and to make your happiness a priority.  It is NECESSARY" - Mandy Hale//

Learning to take care of myself has been a lesson I have struggled with...and continue to struggle with.  The quote listed at the beginning of this post is much easier said than done...as most words of advice are.  Making my overall health and happiness a priority has just recently become a priority for me. 

During high school and college, academics and working hard to attain my goals was my motivation for everything.  I overextended myself in high school...at one point being on the cheerleading squad, marching band as 1st chair clarinet, while simultaneously being the captain of the flagline and taking the maximum amount of AP courses.  Back then I was young, and my confidence was at an all-time high.  I was smart--I had never failed an exam in my life and school was relatively easy for me (except physics...physics has never been easy for me in any stage of my life). My testing anxiety was non-existent in those days.

Then I got to college.  No shade, just truth...but there are levels to colleges.  Some colleges are more grueling than others.  Some college are easier than others.  Some colleges are more prestigious than others.  Some colleges (by name alone) carry more weight in your academic future than others. I was blessed to have prepared myself though academics and entrance exam scores to attend a small, academically grueling and prestigious college in Brunswick, Maine. I thoroughly enjoyed my college experience.  I worked hard, played hard and learned a lot...but the material was hard, and my anxiety worsened. 

Medicine is not all white coats and roses, what do you do to relax and take care of yourself?

Relaxation is so important. I take care of myself by sleeping! Oh, do I love sleep.  I also get a massage every Saturday or Sunday (depending on which day is my off day). There is no point in getting a massage for less than 60min, so I usually go for 90minutes (I splurge on myself). I spend time with my friends as much as I can (they keep me sane).  Also, I made a vow to myself that every vacation I get in residency, I will make it a point to go on a trip somewhere.  I recently took a trip to Vegas and spent 50% of my time there lounging in the bed and relaxing.  Just being away was great therapy for me.  I enjoy having dinners and wine after a long day on my deck overlooking the beautiful scenery that is Northwest Arkansas.  I enjoy hanging out with some of my co-resident on the weekends.  And I've been very lucky to have my friends come to visit me almost every weekend since residency began.

Your Mindset is EVERYTHING!

//"In order to carry a positive action, we must develop here a positive vision" - Dalai Lama //

When you go through transitions and/or tough times, you oftentimes become isolated.  

During this time of isolation, you must choose what you will do with it. 

1. you can wallow in lonliness (this is the equivalent of choosing a negative mindset)

or 

2. you can utilize this time to get to know YOU, understand your situation, grow and learn from this isolation and come out of it a better person (i.e. a positive mindset) 

The last 2-3 years of my life have been an interesting time.  When I really take the time to look back, a lot has occurred in the last few years. 

- I reached a milestone in my life by completing my MD/MPH degree and began my medical residency training -- unfortunately, I experienced all of this joy and progress and happiness without a person that I had expected to be in my life forever. 

- I moved to a town where I practically knew no-one to begin the grueling work schedule that is residency, while working to sustain a long-distance, new relationship. 

- I had to navigate, daily, the difficulty of being a young, tall, minority female working as a physician in a male-dominated field in Arkansas (the stories I could tell..and will, with time). 

- I had to work on getting control over my anxiety (which at times can be extremely overwhelming--specifically when it comes to examinations). 

- I had to control my anxiety, while working about 100hrs a week, while simultaneously studying for Step 3 -- a 2-day, 16- hour exam. 

There is probably so much more I can list when it comes to things that crowd my headspace daily and attribute to my stress and anxiety over that last few years, but I think that is enough.  During this time, I have chosen the #2 option above. I have been in my own world, dealing with my own "stuff", navigating my own obstacles, learning about me and figuring out what I want and/or need. This time has been exhausting, precious, beneficial and is currently still on-going. 

I hope that when you enter these transitions or moments in your life, you also choose 2! I hope you choose a positive mindset that results in positive outcomes -- especially understanding and growth*

XOXO

Dr. Z